20 Pieces of Advice for Young Men

I’ve gone through the battle (and I’m still going through it).

I’ve been who you are, I’ve been where you are, I’ve felt what you’ve felt.

Maybe you’re a guy who’s underpaid or unemployed (been there).

Maybe you’re a guy who’s hung up on a girl (also been there).

Maybe you’re a guy who is pursuing something a little out of the norm of what your parents think is a “respectable job” and one or both of your parents don’t understand (been there, done that, have the T-shirt).

Whatever scenario you’re in, you’re bound to find something in these 20 pieces of advice for young men.

As a disclaimer, I am still human and I am still learning and growing every day. Don’t think of these 20 pieces of advice for young men as absolutes, think of them as suggestions.

With that, let’s dive in:

1. Start living a self-development lifestyle

To kick this off and the chief piece of advice for young men is to live a lifestyle of self-improvement and self development.

What is a self-development lifestyle?

It is a lifestyle where you are dedicated to becoming a renewed and greater version of yourself and one where you build a strong foundation on which to capitalize on any future success.

Some of these activities may include:

• Managing and allocating time to areas of best use
• Reading self-improvement/self-development books
• Joining groups in which one can learn a new skill or strengthen an existing one
• Making or renewing a commitment to be in good physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health

This is what I talk about in my ebook 7 Surefire Ways to Dramatically Change Your Life in 90 Days.

2. Get your hormone levels checked

Many guys are focused on getting high testosterone levels. This is important. Testosterone is one of the main hormones responsible for male biological functioning, but it’s not the only one.

Other hormones’ presence or absence will determine how you feel and function.

To see if you’re in an optimal state – order a full hormone panel.

I did mine through Everlywell.

Everywell’s Men’s Health test gives you a breakdown of your testosterone levels, DHEA, estradiol, and more.

When I took my test, it said I had higher than normal cortisol levels. Since I got this information, I took a number of proactive steps to correct it.

Even if you’re not going to use Everlywell as your provider, definitely do get a hormone panel done at least once a year.

But if you do decide to use that link above, you’ll get 15% off your first order.

3. Most people do not give a damn about you

This goes for “people” in general, but for the most part – if you’re a man, the general world will give less of a care about you than a woman would.

Part of this is biological (women are the bearers of children), part of this is societal/sociological (he’s a big boy, he can take care of himself).

This counts even more if you are a male of a minority class for your country/society.

4. Much advice you will hear/read/see is useless

You’ve receive advice from many people on your journey. Most of it won’t be relevant to you.

Why?

Because most people aren’t going in the direction you’re going in.

If you’re after self-improvement and success – most people aren’t in that lane. Their advice is usually geared around avoiding pain and seeking pleasure at some level. This is the opposite of self development and creating an enviable lifestyle.

Therefore, it is not congruent with your path in life.

I talk about this more in depth in this podcast episode:

5. Learn about money

Money is a necessary evil in our current existence and learning about it is essential. Many people unfortunately lack financial literacy, which will make their life harder than it needs to be.

6. Save at least 15% of your income

If you want to become financially independent, consider saving 15% of everything you earn. This includes bonuses, gifts, capital gains, etc.

I started doing this day one when I started working and it has helped me to build a nice buffer of liquid cash.

In retrospect, I actually wished I saved 20% because – the more the merrier.

And while reading this, you might say “but I have a lot of debt I need to pay off”. I did too. But I still saved.

And if I was in a month that had many things I needed to spend on, I dipped into that savings. Next paycheck would come and it would replenish + add to it.

As time progressed, I created increments in my finances where my savings were able to grow over time and where my debts lowered over time.

Disclaimer: This is not financial advice. Please consult with a certified financial planner for advice tailored to your unique financial situation.

7. Learn feminine psychology

One half of the population on this planet are women. Much of your adult life will be spent trying to get into and maintaining some sort of relationship with them (if you’re hetero). It’s important to understand how women think and why they do what they do.

Try to put yourself in their shoes.

Can you imagined being catcalled by a gang of guys when you’re trying to walk to your apartment?

Can you imagine a guy twice your size forcing himself on you and you can’t do anything to stop it?

Can you imagine not knowing if the guy you’re on a date with is a psycho killer?

Think about it.

8. Friendship must be tested

Anyone can be a friend when it’s 70 degrees, clear, and sunny.

But when it starts pouring down rain and there’s nothing but mud everywhere you step, that’s how you find out who the real homies are.

Friends aren’t friends when everything’s nice and dandy.

Friends are friends when shit hits the fan.

Do you have anyone like that in your life?

9. Learn natural laws

The world has existed long before you and the world will exist long after you.

As such, there’s certain laws that govern this existence we live in. These laws are not man made.

One example? Gravity. Easily observable, but the others are much less so.

Your job is to learn these rules as best as you can and adjust yourself in accordance to them. If you don’t, your life will be miserable.

Here’s a few of them.

10. Learn, period.

As a young man, you should be trying to comprehend more and more of how this world works.

You won’t understand everything (nor should you) but every day, more and more things should be making sense to you.

Think of it like standing in a big, dark room. As time passes, more of the room lights up. The entire room will never be lit up (for most people at least, this is “enlightenment”) but you should be able to see more of where you’re standing as time goes on.

11. Unlearn.

Much of your young adult life will be spent unlearning beliefs that you were programmed with at an early age.

You’ll need to create your own belief system. What do YOU believe in? What do YOU stand for? Not your parents, not your friends, not your 9th grade Algebra teacher, but YOU.

12. Develop your focus

Focus is how you take your intangible and tangible gifts and refine them into something of value. Focus is how you get from “here” to “there”. Therefore, focus is important.

Unfortunately, we live in a time where your focus can be easily scattered amongst the various things in our world.

You should fight like hell to keep it and work like hell to reclaim it if you’ve somehow lost it.

13. Gain leverage over life conditions

Depending on who you are and your unique life circumstances, you may have had an easier or harder go at this “life thing” than some others.

If you’re in the latter corner, you need to fight like hell to gain leverage in your life.

Meaning, if you are someone who’s from a poorer background, you may have to scrabble twice as hard just to get a middle class existence that someone else was born into.

Whether this looks like a side hustle or studying nights and weekends to develop a skill or a get a certification which can help you make more money, if you don’t want to spend the next 40, 50 years of your life in misery – develop yourself into a person of value who can write their own ticket.

14. Develop yourself into someone who can give value

Our current society is a capitalistic system which rewards people who can create and deliver value.

What is value?

Value is the price someone is willing to pay in a marketplace for a product or service.

If I am in need of someone who has a skill that will help me, I am willing to pay a premium for it.

The more people who value a skill, the higher price that skill will fetch in the marketplace.

What skills are valuable right now? Which ones will be valuable in the (near) future?

Do you have any of these? Are you developing any of these?

15. It’s called sex DRIVE for a reason

Use it to your advantage.

16. Swim against the current

Don’t do something just because other people are doing it.

Many people are drifting aimlessly. Don’t be another wandering generality. Be a contrarian.

17. Get in the game

Alot of guys are just sort of “waiting around” for something to happen.

They’re “waiting around” for a purpose to strike them like a lightning bolt coming from the heavens.

Well, you might be waiting around until the end of recorded time if you’re waiting for that to happen. Meanwhile, life is passing you by.

Start taking action and start making moves. Yesterday.

18. Create boundaries

Adolescence is an important part in anyone’s life.

This is when a person’s individual sense of sense (AKA the ego) emerges and the physical, mental, and emotional separation from one’s parents – begins. This is beginning of adult consciousness, a distinct sense of self.

While this happens for the most part for most people, it doesn’t happen completely for many people. Meaning, while it’s easy to create physical boundaries, many people (for various reasons) never learn how to create mental and emotional separation from various people.

This opens up a person for manipulation.

If you want to become a man that you and others admire, learn how to create boundaries.

19. Strive to “max out”

I’ve had a philosophy since my early 20s called “maxing out”.

It’s basically where you seek to finish the day on E(mpty). No stone has been left unturned.

This is more of an ideal than a reality, as there are many things internal and external which may stand in the way of us giving 100% (or more) on a daily basis.

The other side to this coin is deriving some emotional content from that day.

When I don’t finish the day with an empty tank, I always try to ask myself: “what’s the lesson here? what did I learn today that I can use to strengthen my self-improvement foundation?”

Never walk away from a day with some type of jewel.

20. Live life on your terms

The ultimate goal of life is self-actualization: becoming all you can be in this one short life you have.

Part of self-actualization and success in general is being able to live a life where you feel complete.

What this looks like in particular is up to you, but this inevitably involves a convergence of financial, social, emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual resources.

It will essentially require all of you.

Conclusion + Wrapping Up

As a young man, your life is in your hands.

What will you do with it? The answer to that question is ultimately up to you, but I hope these suggestions from someone who’s been in the trenches will be enough to get your mind turning and to help you create plans to develop your dreams into reality.

Which pieces of advice were your favorite? Let me know in the comments below.